One of the obvious questions when someone trying to get what they want in life, or decide on a way forward, whether by manifestation or will-power, is: “How do I overcome the limitations of the past?” To put it another way, “How do I get through my blockages and negative self-beliefs, the ones which hold me back from getting what I want and being who I want to be?”

In the past many aspiring manifestors have turned to therapy for help in these areas. And it is true that therapy can indeed change negative self-beliefs…. but often this change occurs slowly and sometimes it doesn’t happen at all. This may be due to the fact that there is some unconscious advantage to resisting change (after all, safety may lie with the familiar), or it may simply be due to the fact that your unconscious repressed limiting beliefs are not accessible to conventional therapy.

Fortunately, there is an answer to this dilemma: shadow work. This is an approach to therapy which reaches the deepest levels of the unconscious mind and can therefore change the deepest underlying negative beliefs which one holds about oneself.

Shadow work is a type of therapeutic practice that focuses on exploring and integrating the aspects of ourselves that we have repressed or rejected, typically due to social conditioning or trauma. The goal of shadow work is to bring these unconscious parts of ourselves to the surface, examine them, and integrate them into our conscious awareness.

Other types of therapies may focus on different aspects of our mental and emotional well-being. For example, cognitive-behavioral therapy (CBT) focuses on identifying and changing negative thought patterns and behaviors, while mindfulness-based therapies aim to increase present-moment awareness and promote relaxation and acceptance.

While shadow work can be a part of other therapeutic approaches, it is a unique practice in that it specifically aims to bring to light the parts of ourselves that we have disowned or rejected. Shadow work can be intense and emotional, as it often involves confronting painful or uncomfortable experiences and emotions. However, by facing these aspects of ourselves, we can gain a greater understanding of our motivations and behaviours and ultimately lead a more authentic and fulfilling life. And, more to the point for an aspiring manifestor, we can often come to believe that not only is change possible, but also that we can actually get what we want because we deserve it and are worth it!

What happens during a shadow work session?

The specifics of a shadow work session can vary depending on the therapist and the individual’s needs, but generally, the session will involve exploring and processing the client’s unconscious or repressed emotions and experiences. You can read more about this here.

During a shadow work session, the therapist will guide the client through various techniques and exercises to help them access and process their shadow material. The eaxct form of the work will vary according to the individual’s needs, but generally, the session will involve exploring and processing the client’s unconscious, repressed emotions and experiences.

During a shadow work session, the therapist will guide the client through various techniques and exercises to help them access and process their shadow material. This may include visualization exercises, journaling, dream analysis, and role-playing.

The therapist will help the client identify their shadow aspects, such as repressed emotions, negative self-beliefs, or trauma, and encourage them to examine and explore these aspects. This process can be intense and emotional, as the client may need to confront painful or uncomfortable experiences and emotions. Doing so, however, can release a tremendous amount of spiritual, physical and emotional energy which then becomes available to the client for productive use – in particular for use in shaping the life they want to live.

As the client explores their shadow aspects, the therapist will provide a safe and supportive environment to help them process their emotions and integrate their shadow material into their conscious awareness. This can lead to increased self-awareness, emotional healing, and personal growth. It can also lead to greater autonomy, agency and personal power.

It is important to note that shadow work is a process, and it may take multiple sessions or ongoing therapy to fully integrate and heal from these aspects of ourselves. It is also important to work with a trained and experienced therapist who can provide a safe and supportive environment for this work. A list of trained and experienced shadow work coaches and therapists can be seen here.

Many individuals have reported positive outcomes from shadow work, including increased self-awareness, emotional healing, and personal growth. However, the effectiveness of shadow work depends on several factors, including the individual’s willingness to engage in the process, the skill and experience of the therapist, and the individual’s personal circumstances.

Shadow work can be challenging and emotionally intense, as it often involves confronting painful or uncomfortable aspects of ourselves. It may take time and consistent effort to fully integrate and heal from these aspects of ourselves.

That being said, shadow work can be a powerful tool for personal growth and transformation when practiced in a safe and supportive environment with a trained and experienced therapist. By confronting and integrating our shadow aspects, we can gain a greater understanding of our motivations and behaviours and ultimately lead a more authentic and fulfilling life.

How do I find a therapist trained in shadow work?

Finding a therapist trained in shadow work can be a bit challenging, as shadow work is still somewhat unknown.  However, there are therapists who specialize in this type of work or incorporate it into their practice.

One way to find a therapist trained in shadow work is to search for therapists from a recognised training institute, such as this one, who specialize in Jungian psychology. (Carl Jung is often credited with developing the concept of the shadow self.) Other therapists may describe their approach as “depth psychology” or “transpersonal psychology,” which may also include shadow work.

You can also search for therapists who offer holistic or integrative approaches to therapy, as these therapists may be more likely to incorporate shadow work into their practice. You can use online directories such as Psychology Today or GoodTherapy to search for therapists in your area who offer these types of therapy.

When contacting potential therapists, you can ask if they incorporate shadow work into their practice or if they have experience working with clients on exploring their unconscious or repressed emotions and experiences. Ultimately, finding the right therapist is a personal process, and it may take some trial and error to find a therapist who is a good fit for you and your needs. But it is well worth persisting! The rewards can far exceed the effort involved!

Finding your right livelihood is not a matter of chance – it’s a matter of planning and good intention. Here are some useful guidelines.

Consider What You Would Do To Help The World And The People In It – Right Now

Over the years I’ve worked with clients, I’ve discovered that the majority of people find their life purpose is fundamentally to do with connection.

That may be connecting with other people and supporting them in some way, or connecting with Mother Earth and supporting her.

Although I’m still wondering whether everybody’s mission is ultimately about greater connection, I rather suspect that it might be.

So ask yourself what social, environmental, community or family problem you care about, and start doing something which contributes to a solution.

Video – finding and integrating your shadow

Obviously you can’t solve all the world’s problems, but you can make a difference. Feeling powerless and disempowered helps nobody; believing that you can do something which will impact people and make a difference changes everything. And what stops you from doing these things is your shadow. You can read about that here.

Shadow work – integrating your shadow – changes everything because you reclaim your own power. You become more powerful. You become more emotionally and physically whole. You inspire other people by your example. And by inspiring other people, you are at the foundation of a greater movement which eventually becomes the norm – for you and those who emulate you as their Leader. (Hopefully a Heart Centred Leader.)

Not only that, but following your mission and purpose gives you a feeling of power, satisfaction and joy because you are indeed contributing to positive change in the world.

And people who believe they are making a difference seemed a lot happier than people who spend their time moaning about how bad things are.

What Do You Fantasise About? A Clue to Your Soul Purpose!

I am absolutely sure there’s something you want to do, something you believe you could do, something you imagine yourself doing… but somehow, for some reason, you don’t do it.

I’m sure you can come up with plenty of “reasons” why you don’t do it. Maybe you’re scared of what other people might think. But, to be blunt, there’s always a deeper reason for not doing something than “what other people might think”.

Generally it comes down to fear. And one thing I can tell you about fear is that a great way to destroy it, and all the illusions which lie behind it, is simply to take action.

The fear which is in your shadow, put there by other people, is the fear which will prevent you from moving forwards in your life and getting what you want. It will also prevent you form being the King or Queen you can be.

But when you engage with shadow work (provided, that is, that you have done enough work to bring the finer qualities of these archetypes out of shadow), little can stop you from getting what you want. Being what you want. having the impact you want. Read about the nature of shadow here. And explore the reasons for doing your personal work here.

When you do what you’re frightened of, whether that’s lifting the phone to speak to somebody, asking for an interview, trying out a new idea, exposing your vulnerability to the world, or taking any kind of risk, you defeat your fear and give yourself an insight into how courageous you truly are – even if you don’t succeed.

The women and men who allow themselves to be constrained by fear are the ones who don’t get anywhere.

So when you fantasise about doing something, and you feel you really want to do it, summon up your courage, find a way to do it and learn from what happens. You never know, you might be successful!

What Absorbs You So Completely You Forget About Everything Else?

A great clue to hunt down your passion is to look at what makes you lose track of time – you know, the one which can even make you forget to eat dinner.

We’ve all had that experience, and there’s an important message in there.

If you can become so absorbed in what you’re doing that you forget to eat, and don’t notice the passage of time, then it’s likely you’ve found one of your passions.

And somewhere in your passion there’s a clue to your purpose.

Even if your passion is playing video games at all hours of the day and night, maybe there’s a reason why that’s your passion, a reason that could help you find your purpose in life. Maybe you want to spread a message through this medium! It would certainly be a great way to connect with people!

How to find your purpose

Another way to look at this is to consider where your tolerance for failure is high.

In other words, where in your life do you put most effort towards succeeding? Where can you tolerate your mistakes, and carry on with enthusiasm and passion?

For me, the first item of wooden furniture I built gave me a clue that this was one of my passions – to create beautiful and useful objects made of wood.

And even though I made some blunders in measuring and sawing the timber for the bed I was building, my determination to create a functional and aesthetically beautiful piece of furniture drove me on until I succeeded.

Is that my life purpose? No, but there’s something about persistence, trail and error, creativity and creation in the mix here, something which can help me to understand my skillset. And that includes skills which I can bring to my life purpose of healing people’s emotional wounds.

Interview Your Younger Self and Your Older Self

If your five-year-old, your ten-year-old, and your fifteen-year-old selves could come back to life and speak to you now, what would they tell you about the way you’re spending your life? The answer, of course, is that they would tell you – whether they knew it or not – about the shadows that formed in your early life. They would reveal. simply by speaking their truth, what qualities and attributes they had hidden away to stay safe, to continue to be accepted. And that  would give you a clear view of what you could have achieved if only you had examined the unspoken and hidden shadows in you unconscious using shadow work earlier in life. And perhaps still can, if you do the work.

Finding Hidden Shadow Beliefs With Shadow Work

Well, the good news is that your younger parts are available to you, and they can do exactly that.

All you have to do is imagine your 15-year-old, 10-year-old or 5-year-old standing opposite you, close your eyes, and ask them a question – “What did you most want to do in the world?”

You can then switch yourself physically into the position of your younger self, and answer that question from the knowledge and wisdom of the younger part of yourself which still lives inside you.

Crazy though this may sound, all the parts of you that ever lived are still present in a very real way inside your mind. They can tell you better than anyone about your childhood dreams and aspirations.

Perhaps the answers to the questions you have about your life purpose lies somewhere in a conversation with those parts of yourself. This is one of the fundamental techniques of shadow work.

Try it with an open mind. You’re almost certainly going to be surprised by the answers.

And if you wish, you can have the same conversation with the beautiful and older parts of yourself, the seeds of which currently lie inside you.

Choose an age – perhaps the age at which you consider you will have reached wise elderhood – and imagine that part of you to be standing opposite you.

Ask that part of you, with your eyes closed, “What are you most proud of having achieved in your life?” Or perhaps “What would you most like to have achieved in your life?”

Again, physically switch into that place and answer the question from the imagined elder that you will become.

After all, that part of you already knows what you will most regret not having done when you come to your final moments on earth. And of course, that part of you also knows what you could have been most proud about doing in your life on earth.

Read more about shadow work and depth psychology here.